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00:00:01,261 --> 00:00:04,538
Translated By The Community Of WWW.MY-SUBS.COM
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00:00:04,538 --> 00:00:05,422
So if the toaster won't go down,
3
00:00:06,691 --> 00:00:07,926
it's probably because
it is not plugged in.
4
00:00:07,926 --> 00:00:09,727
Yes, we know how a toaster works.
5
00:00:09,727 --> 00:00:12,063
Oh, remember
to turn the colonel twice a day
6
00:00:12,063 --> 00:00:13,164
or he will get bedsores.
7
00:00:13,164 --> 00:00:14,999
Gross. Somebody been doing that?
8
00:00:14,999 --> 00:00:16,384
Yes, I have.
9
00:00:17,135 --> 00:00:20,004
Okay. Ah.
If you run out of toilet paper...
10
00:00:20,004 --> 00:00:22,040
Then I'll use the bath mat.
Just go, okay?
11
00:00:22,040 --> 00:00:23,708
What are you blathering about?
12
00:00:23,708 --> 00:00:24,909
You know, the list...
13
00:00:24,909 --> 00:00:26,878
of things to get done while I'm gone.
14
00:00:26,878 --> 00:00:27,912
I didn't even know you
were talking to us.
15
00:00:27,912 --> 00:00:28,880
You know what? We're good.
16
00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:29,948
Right, guys? We're good.
17
00:00:29,948 --> 00:00:31,716
Go have fun in-in...
18
00:00:31,716 --> 00:00:33,151
Uh... where you going?
19
00:00:33,151 --> 00:00:34,953
I'm going to the city for a spa weekend.
20
00:00:34,953 --> 00:00:37,155
- Wait, why do you need a break?
- Yeah, you do nothing.
21
00:00:37,155 --> 00:00:40,124
Hey. I am the glue that
holds this house together.
22
00:00:40,124 --> 00:00:41,860
You think it just
magically cleans itself
23
00:00:41,860 --> 00:00:43,127
in the middle of the night?
24
00:00:43,127 --> 00:00:45,864
Oh, no. No,
you clean it in the middle of the night
25
00:00:45,864 --> 00:00:47,031
'cause you're all
cranked on amphetamines.
26
00:00:47,031 --> 00:00:48,166
Well, it gets done, doesn't it?
27
00:00:48,166 --> 00:00:49,868
But then, I don't sleep all night
28
00:00:49,868 --> 00:00:51,069
'cause you're up there clomping around
29
00:00:51,069 --> 00:00:52,871
like some kind of hillbilly Santa Claus.
30
00:00:52,871 --> 00:00:54,806
You know,
I just leave this on the fridge.
31
00:00:54,806 --> 00:00:56,207
All right, great.
32
00:00:56,207 --> 00:00:58,910
Hey, Alba, do you want to hear
about my dream last night?
33
00:00:58,910 --> 00:01:00,912
Ooh, more than anything, but, you know,
34
00:01:00,912 --> 00:01:03,114
I am off the clock, Benito.
Tell it to Mickey.
35
00:01:03,114 --> 00:01:04,949
- Oh...
- Do you want to hear about it?
36
00:01:04,949 --> 00:01:06,150
It was a weird one.
37
00:01:06,150 --> 00:01:08,653
- What the hell. Go ahead.
- Okay, so,
38
00:01:08,653 --> 00:01:10,855
- I was on the playground at recess
- Uh...
39
00:01:10,855 --> 00:01:12,056
and Principal Gibbons came up to me,
40
00:01:12,056 --> 00:01:13,791
but he wasn't Principal Gibbons,
41
00:01:13,791 --> 00:01:15,059
- he was a werewolf.
- Oh, yeah?
42
00:01:15,059 --> 00:01:17,929
He had the biggest hands
and really long nails.
43
00:01:17,929 --> 00:01:19,931
- Oh.
- And he was really tall and big.
44
00:01:19,931 --> 00:01:21,900
And then the werewolf army came,
45
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and there was, like, a billion of them.
46
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I was so scared!
47
00:01:26,838 --> 00:01:29,073
And then I shot the biggest werewolf,
48
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and instead of dying,
he turned into a robot werewolf,
49
00:01:33,011 --> 00:01:35,847
and he's like, "Give me candy."
50
00:01:35,847 --> 00:01:36,848
So I ran to the candy store,
51
00:01:36,848 --> 00:01:38,750
and I got him some candy.
52
00:01:38,750 --> 00:01:42,787
And he ate it so really,
really, really fast.
53
00:01:42,787 --> 00:01:44,889
Then I gave all the
werewolves bubblegum.
54
00:01:44,889 --> 00:01:46,090
Yep. Yep. A little close, though.
55
00:01:46,090 --> 00:01:47,892
But they were eating it
and they were eating it,
56
00:01:47,892 --> 00:01:49,127
- and it got stuck...
- I can still hear you.
57
00:01:49,127 --> 00:01:50,995
You don't have to get so close.
There we go.
58
00:01:50,995 --> 00:01:52,931
And then I was like, "That's it!
59
00:01:52,931 --> 00:01:55,066
"All the candy in the whole,
entire world is gone.
60
00:01:55,066 --> 00:01:57,101
Sorry, Mr. Werewolf Robot."
61
00:01:57,101 --> 00:01:58,937
Yeah, yeah, I get it. He likes candy.
62
00:01:58,937 --> 00:02:00,835
We all have our vices.
No more talking, all right?
63
00:02:01,973 --> 00:02:03,841
But... but don't you want
to hear how it ends?
64
00:02:03,841 --> 00:02:05,944
I don't, I don't. But only because
65
00:02:05,944 --> 00:02:09,047
I want to marinate in the suspense.
Sweet dreams.
66
00:02:09,047 --> 00:02:10,815
But it's still light out.
67
00:02:10,815 --> 00:02:12,884
My God, how is it only 6:00?
68
00:02:12,884 --> 00:02:14,719
Um, okay, well, you know what?
69
00:02:14,719 --> 00:02:16,818
It'll be dark when you close your eyes.
70
00:02:17,989 --> 00:02:19,921
Jimmy, we're going out. Go get ready.
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00:02:23,027 --> 00:02:25,697
I am ready.
72
00:02:25,697 --> 00:02:28,833
Uh, Sabrina, you're in charge of
Ben and Chip till we get back.
73
00:02:28,833 --> 00:02:30,101
- Decline.
- Please?
74
00:02:30,101 --> 00:02:32,070
I've been wrangling Ben all day long.
75
00:02:32,070 --> 00:02:33,104
Sorry. Not my problem.
76
00:02:33,104 --> 00:02:34,973
Come on, just be a team player.
77
00:02:34,973 --> 00:02:36,638
Ladies, please. I'll be in charge.
78
00:02:37,909 --> 00:02:40,011
Oh, sorry. No.
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00:02:40,011 --> 00:02:42,680
I wouldn't put you in charge of
changing the colonel's diaper.
80
00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:44,015
What are you talking about? I'm capable.
81
00:02:44,015 --> 00:02:46,084
Mm, well, you're capable
of asphyxiating yourself
82
00:02:46,084 --> 00:02:48,820
with a phone cord, or, uh...
getting an action figure
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00:02:48,820 --> 00:02:50,121
stuck up your butt, I'll give you that.
84
00:02:50,121 --> 00:02:51,856
An act...
Why would I have an action figure
85
00:02:51,856 --> 00:02:53,157
stuck up my butt?
86
00:02:53,157 --> 00:02:54,926
I'm not gonna sit here
and try and speculate
87
00:02:54,926 --> 00:02:56,127
as to why you do the things you do.
88
00:02:56,127 --> 00:02:57,862
I don't... I don't do that.
89
00:02:57,862 --> 00:02:59,998
Uh, we'll be back in,
like, two to ten hours.
90
00:02:59,998 --> 00:03:02,731
Yeah? And if you need anything,
Alba left a list on the fridge.
91
00:03:03,414 --> 00:03:04,936
What list?
92
00:03:04,936 --> 00:03:06,868
I have no idea what she's talking about.
93
00:03:08,673 --> 00:03:11,109
Now approaching
our final stop, Penn Station.
94
00:03:11,109 --> 00:03:14,042
All passengers, please exit the train.
95
00:03:19,751 --> 00:03:21,986
Penn Station. Last stop.
96
00:03:21,986 --> 00:03:24,022
The train is going out of
service for the weekend.
97
00:03:24,022 --> 00:03:26,791
Everyone please exit the train.
98
00:03:26,791 --> 00:03:29,727
Wh... No. Oh, come on.
99
00:03:29,727 --> 00:03:31,029
Hello?
100
00:03:31,029 --> 00:03:32,930
- Penn Station. Last stop.
- I'm stuck in here!
101
00:03:32,930 --> 00:03:35,096
- The train is going out of service for the weekend.
- Come on.
102
00:03:36,523 --> 00:03:37,902
No, no! Rat!
103
00:03:37,902 --> 00:03:40,635
Rat, rat, rat, rat! Somebody!
104
00:03:42,840 --> 00:03:44,676
There we go. There-there's one.
105
00:03:44,676 --> 00:03:45,977
Nah, he's already taking it.
106
00:03:45,977 --> 00:03:47,145
Jimmy, just come on, get in there.
107
00:03:47,145 --> 00:03:49,047
I don't want to drive around all night.
108
00:03:49,047 --> 00:03:50,982
What do you want from me, all right?
He's already backing in.
109
00:03:50,982 --> 00:03:53,718
Okay. Cool. I'll do everything.
110
00:03:53,718 --> 00:03:56,821
Let's not make this a thing, please. Uh.
111
00:03:56,821 --> 00:03:58,110
Oh, whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa.
112
00:03:58,956 --> 00:04:00,825
Hey, excuse me. That's-that's my spot.
113
00:04:00,825 --> 00:04:02,057
How come I'm standing in it then?
114
00:04:05,046 --> 00:04:06,864
Bro, are you serious?
115
00:04:06,864 --> 00:04:08,833
I know, man, all right? Come on,
I'm trying to take the lady out.
116
00:04:08,833 --> 00:04:10,068
So just help me out, all right?
117
00:04:10,068 --> 00:04:11,936
- How about I give you a few bucks?
- Oh, boy.
118
00:04:11,936 --> 00:04:13,905
Oh, God.
119
00:04:13,905 --> 00:04:15,773
- Okay, gentlemen...
- No, you know what, I got it.
120
00:04:15,773 --> 00:04:17,675
- Just... No. Mick, no, please.
- Everyone back in your...
121
00:04:17,675 --> 00:04:18,976
- Step back, please.
- Oh, God. That's...
122
00:04:18,976 --> 00:04:20,745
All right, look,
I didn't know there was four of you,
123
00:04:20,745 --> 00:04:22,744
but I could still make
it worth your while.
124
00:04:23,353 --> 00:04:25,650
Dude, I'm not doing it, all right?
125
00:04:25,650 --> 00:04:27,716
I got change here. That's, like,
at least a whole bunch of...
126
00:04:30,981 --> 00:04:32,890
All right, guys. Hey, fun's over.
127
00:04:32,890 --> 00:04:34,692
Why don't you head home.
128
00:04:34,692 --> 00:04:37,829
Whatever. You got lucky, bro.
129
00:04:37,829 --> 00:04:39,828
Dude, here's the thing,
I don't believe in luck.
130
00:04:47,171 --> 00:04:50,808
Oh! Did you just hit that guy
in both eyes at the same time?
131
00:04:50,808 --> 00:04:53,010
I raccoon'd him. It's my signature move.
132
00:04:53,010 --> 00:04:55,079
- I'm Jimmy
- Doug.
133
00:04:55,079 --> 00:04:57,145
- That's a cool name.
- Thanks, man.
134
00:04:58,276 --> 00:04:59,817
I-I got to thank you.
135
00:04:59,817 --> 00:05:02,016
This is the most exciting
start of a date night
136
00:05:02,572 --> 00:05:03,988
I've had in my entire life.
137
00:05:03,988 --> 00:05:05,823
- Yeah?
- Yeah, oh, yeah. That-that was real nice.
138
00:05:05,823 --> 00:05:06,991
Excuse me one second.
139
00:05:06,991 --> 00:05:09,994
Yeah? Yes.
140
00:05:09,994 --> 00:05:12,730
What? From where?
141
00:05:12,730 --> 00:05:14,896
All right, yeah, I'll be right there.
142
00:05:15,715 --> 00:05:16,934
The cops just picked up Ben
143
00:05:16,934 --> 00:05:19,637
riding his bike down
the side of the highway.
144
00:05:19,637 --> 00:05:20,671
I got to go pick him up.
145
00:05:20,671 --> 00:05:21,939
We just got here.
146
00:05:21,939 --> 00:05:23,808
I can give you a lift.
147
00:05:23,808 --> 00:05:25,643
Oh. Is that cool, Mick?
148
00:05:25,643 --> 00:05:27,945
Yeah. Spend your evening
with a-a total stranger.
149
00:05:27,945 --> 00:05:29,744
No problem. I'll do this by myself.
150
00:05:35,019 --> 00:05:36,687
Buy me a drink, man?
151
00:05:36,687 --> 00:05:37,755
- Yeah, bro.
- All right.
152
00:05:37,755 --> 00:05:38,953
You can have your spot now!
153
00:05:42,805 --> 00:05:44,797
I woke up in the middle of
the night and there weren't
154
00:05:44,797 --> 00:05:46,966
any adults home,
so I went out to find you.
155
00:05:46,966 --> 00:05:48,868
I can't believe how selfish she is.
156
00:05:48,868 --> 00:05:50,856
Well, I was around, pal.
How come you didn't look for me?
157
00:05:50,856 --> 00:05:52,521
'Cause you're not an adult.
158
00:05:54,557 --> 00:05:55,824
Oh, hey. What the hell, man?
159
00:05:56,611 --> 00:05:58,430
- What?
- You said you were gonna stay home
160
00:05:58,430 --> 00:06:00,399
- and watch the kids last night.
- No, I didn't.
161
00:06:00,399 --> 00:06:02,434
- Well, it was implied.
- No, it wasn't.
162
00:06:02,434 --> 00:06:04,569
I had to go pick up Ben
from the police station
163
00:06:04,569 --> 00:06:05,737
because you decided to go out and leave
164
00:06:05,737 --> 00:06:07,472
two little kids home alone.
165
00:06:07,472 --> 00:06:08,673
Call me a kid one more time,
166
00:06:08,673 --> 00:06:10,542
and I'll box your frickin' ears.
167
00:06:10,542 --> 00:06:12,411
Alba and I ask for
just a little time off,
168
00:06:12,411 --> 00:06:13,578
and this is how you repay us?
169
00:06:13,578 --> 00:06:15,514
Alba was our maid for 17 years.
170
00:06:15,514 --> 00:06:16,715
You talked to Ben for a few hours,
171
00:06:16,715 --> 00:06:17,783
then put him to bed in broad daylight.
172
00:06:17,783 --> 00:06:19,451
Hey! No, don't do that.
173
00:06:19,451 --> 00:06:20,852
Don't minimize my work.
174
00:06:20,852 --> 00:06:22,521
You know, I'm starting to
think you don't appreciate
175
00:06:22,521 --> 00:06:23,688
anything I do for you.
176
00:06:23,688 --> 00:06:24,856
You do nothing for me.
177
00:06:24,856 --> 00:06:26,591
And I do nothing for you.
178
00:06:26,591 --> 00:06:28,390
We have a good system,
let's not mess with it.
179
00:06:29,823 --> 00:06:30,726
Yo, Mick,
180
00:06:31,505 --> 00:06:33,047
- we're going out tonight.
- Yeah? Great.
181
00:06:33,047 --> 00:06:34,036
I'm in. Where we going?
182
00:06:34,036 --> 00:06:35,634
- You know my buddy, Doug?
- Mm-mm.
183
00:06:35,634 --> 00:06:37,602
Doug, from last night.
Doug, from the fight.
184
00:06:37,602 --> 00:06:39,604
- The total stranger?
- He's, like, the coolest guy
185
00:06:39,604 --> 00:06:40,739
I've ever met, all right?
And you know that I have
186
00:06:40,739 --> 00:06:42,441
a hard time making male friends.
187
00:06:42,441 --> 00:06:44,409
- You do?
- Yeah. They find me intimidating.
188
00:06:44,409 --> 00:06:45,644
Look, Doug and his girlfriend
189
00:06:45,644 --> 00:06:47,338
are gonna meet us out
for scorpion bowls.
190
00:06:47,338 --> 00:06:49,042
Okay, there you go.
191
00:06:49,042 --> 00:06:50,178
That's what you lead with.
192
00:06:50,178 --> 00:06:51,550
I'm in. 100% in.
193
00:06:51,550 --> 00:06:53,582
Just got to, uh,
secure a sitter for the kids.
194
00:06:59,221 --> 00:07:00,025
Hey.
195
00:07:00,025 --> 00:07:02,427
- What the hell?
- Oh, you are so sweet
196
00:07:02,427 --> 00:07:04,463
to offer to babysit.
You didn't have to do that.
197
00:07:04,463 --> 00:07:06,565
Mickey, are you insane?
Uncuff me right now.
198
00:07:06,565 --> 00:07:09,434
Tempting, but, um... no.
199
00:07:09,434 --> 00:07:11,470
- Mickey, I'm warning you. I will...
- Uh-uh. No.
200
00:07:11,470 --> 00:07:13,605
You're not warning anybody.
You brought this on yourself.
201
00:07:13,605 --> 00:07:15,807
I tried to be reasonable,
but you weren't having it.
202
00:07:15,807 --> 00:07:17,642
So guess what?
Here's how it's gonna go down.
203
00:07:17,642 --> 00:07:19,444
Jimmy and I are headed out for the night
204
00:07:19,444 --> 00:07:20,913
and you're gonna stay
here and watch Ben.
205
00:07:20,913 --> 00:07:22,848
And if you do a really good job,
206
00:07:22,848 --> 00:07:24,616
I might give you a
night off next weekend.
207
00:07:24,616 --> 00:07:26,685
Are you serious?
What am I supposed to do all night?
208
00:07:26,685 --> 00:07:28,587
I don't know. I'm sure you
guys will think of something.
209
00:07:28,587 --> 00:07:30,655
Kid's got a hell of an imagination.
Ooh, I know.
210
00:07:30,655 --> 00:07:32,491
Tell her about that
dream you had last night.
211
00:07:32,491 --> 00:07:34,526
- Okay, but it's pretty gross.
- It is gross.
212
00:07:34,526 --> 00:07:36,394
- I was floating down a river,
- Uh-huh.
213
00:07:36,394 --> 00:07:38,630
but instead of water, it was diarrhea.
214
00:07:38,630 --> 00:07:40,665
Diarrhea! Stay tuned. It gets better.
215
00:07:40,665 --> 00:07:42,701
- Uh, you two be good.
- Mickey!
216
00:07:42,701 --> 00:07:45,567
- Want to hear about the rest of it?
- No!
217
00:07:46,738 --> 00:07:49,774
Hi. We're meeting my buddy, Doug.
218
00:07:49,774 --> 00:07:52,511
Yes. The rest of your party is
already here. Right this way.
219
00:07:52,511 --> 00:07:55,514
Can't wait to see Doug's chick.
I bet she's a real rocket.
220
00:07:55,514 --> 00:07:57,482
- Settle down.
- That means she's hot.
221
00:07:57,482 --> 00:07:59,518
Yup, I know what it means.
Who talks like that?
222
00:07:59,518 --> 00:08:01,039
I do. I always have.
223
00:08:05,557 --> 00:08:07,264
Jimmy-crack-corn!
224
00:08:09,604 --> 00:08:10,629
And Mickey.
225
00:08:10,629 --> 00:08:12,597
My goodness, what a rocket.
226
00:08:12,597 --> 00:08:14,633
Oh, thank you.
Jimmy can't stop talking about you.
227
00:08:14,633 --> 00:08:16,434
I haven't said that much, so it's...
228
00:08:16,434 --> 00:08:17,702
Yeah, we hit it off big-time.
229
00:08:17,702 --> 00:08:19,504
- This is my boyfriend, Eric.
- Hey.
230
00:08:19,504 --> 00:08:20,636
- Hi.
- Mickey.
231
00:08:22,747 --> 00:08:23,608
- Hey.
- Hi.
232
00:08:23,608 --> 00:08:25,410
All right, let's get drunk, huh?
233
00:08:25,410 --> 00:08:26,778
No funny business.
234
00:08:26,778 --> 00:08:29,678
Y-You stay on your side
and I will stay on mine.
235
00:08:32,417 --> 00:08:33,785
Hmm? Hmm?
236
00:08:33,785 --> 00:08:35,617
No, you should've brought your own.
No. Hey.
237
00:08:38,407 --> 00:08:41,426
Okay, okay.
That-that-that is very cute, but...
238
00:08:41,426 --> 00:08:42,558
but you are still a rat.
239
00:08:44,785 --> 00:08:47,699
Okay, okay, here you go.
240
00:08:47,699 --> 00:08:49,768
Okay.
241
00:08:49,768 --> 00:08:51,803
Here, l-let's be friends.
242
00:08:51,803 --> 00:08:53,638
Let's be friends.
243
00:08:53,638 --> 00:08:56,538
Okay. Yup, yup. Okay.
244
00:09:02,443 --> 00:09:03,348
Are you serious?
245
00:09:03,348 --> 00:09:06,281
That's what he does, always. Oh, my God.
246
00:09:07,327 --> 00:09:08,620
Everything good, brother?
247
00:09:08,620 --> 00:09:09,785
You're kind of quiet tonight.
248
00:09:10,910 --> 00:09:12,524
Yeah, no, I-I'm fine.
249
00:09:12,524 --> 00:09:14,759
I'm just feeling a little sleepy,
that's all.
250
00:09:14,759 --> 00:09:16,558
You, uh, you want some blow?
251
00:09:17,305 --> 00:09:19,497
Eric, give him the blow.
252
00:09:19,497 --> 00:09:21,430
He's kidding. There's no cocaine.
253
00:09:22,923 --> 00:09:25,637
You. That's a dirty trick. Dirty trick.
254
00:09:25,637 --> 00:09:27,739
I'm sorry, does one of you
own a blue Geo Metro?
255
00:09:27,739 --> 00:09:30,408
Is it leaking oil?
That's all right, it does that.
256
00:09:30,408 --> 00:09:32,611
It's not that. You better take a look.
257
00:09:32,611 --> 00:09:34,312
Oh, my God. I got it. Come on, Mick.
258
00:09:34,312 --> 00:09:35,447
Nah, it's cool. I'll hang back.
259
00:09:35,447 --> 00:09:36,681
- No, come on. I need a hand.
- No, I'm good.
260
00:09:36,681 --> 00:09:37,716
I don't want to get oil on me.
261
00:09:37,716 --> 00:09:38,714
Mick!
262
00:09:39,462 --> 00:09:40,515
- Please.
- All right.
263
00:09:41,541 --> 00:09:42,621
Order another round, okay?
264
00:09:42,621 --> 00:09:43,688
You got it.
265
00:09:43,688 --> 00:09:45,423
- What's the matter with you?
- We're leaving.
266
00:09:45,423 --> 00:09:46,725
W-We're not leaving.
I left my purse there.
267
00:09:46,725 --> 00:09:48,493
Well, I'm sorry,
you're gonna have to get a new one.
268
00:09:48,493 --> 00:09:50,729
- Hey, what is your deal?
- I don't have a deal, all right?
269
00:09:50,729 --> 00:09:52,864
I just feel like Doug is
not who I thought he was.
270
00:09:52,864 --> 00:09:54,499
So we're gonna leave
without saying good-bye.
271
00:09:54,499 --> 00:09:55,597
I...
272
00:09:59,516 --> 00:10:01,506
What the...?
273
00:10:01,506 --> 00:10:04,539
She chained the colonel to your car?
274
00:10:08,966 --> 00:10:09,711
Hi, Mickey.
275
00:10:10,628 --> 00:10:12,273
Have you lost your damn mind?
276
00:10:12,273 --> 00:10:13,685
We can go back and
forth like this forever,
277
00:10:13,685 --> 00:10:15,754
but is that really how you want
to spend your remaining days?
278
00:10:15,754 --> 00:10:18,590
Don't you battle me,
Sabrina, you will lose.
279
00:10:18,590 --> 00:10:21,426
Now kindly unchain the
colonel and go home.
280
00:10:21,426 --> 00:10:23,495
- Not until you unlock me.
- Okay, you know what, ladies,
281
00:10:23,495 --> 00:10:24,663
- why don't we just...
- Shut up, Jimmy.
282
00:10:24,663 --> 00:10:27,763
That's it. I'm over this stupid night.
283
00:10:29,010 --> 00:10:30,502
- Same time.
- Count of three.
284
00:10:30,502 --> 00:10:31,733
One... two... three.
285
00:10:33,072 --> 00:10:34,639
- You!
- I knew it!
286
00:10:34,639 --> 00:10:35,907
Stop screwing around.
287
00:10:35,907 --> 00:10:37,842
You understand me?
288
00:10:37,842 --> 00:10:39,808
One... two... three.
289
00:10:43,848 --> 00:10:45,750
Here we go.
290
00:10:45,750 --> 00:10:47,552
Pleasure doing business with you.
291
00:10:47,552 --> 00:10:49,451
- Where are you going?
- Back to my scorpion bowl.
292
00:10:50,742 --> 00:10:51,920
- Wait right here.
- Okay.
293
00:10:56,628 --> 00:10:58,596
Sorry about that.
294
00:10:58,596 --> 00:11:00,529
Just had to clear something
up with my bitch niece.
295
00:11:01,831 --> 00:11:03,598
Oh, where were we?
296
00:11:04,540 --> 00:11:05,537
What are you doing?
297
00:11:05,537 --> 00:11:06,702
I'm having dinner with my friends.
298
00:11:07,610 --> 00:11:09,674
Everyone, my aforementioned bitch niece.
299
00:11:09,674 --> 00:11:11,609
Look, I'm not babysitting
those two anymore, okay?
300
00:11:11,609 --> 00:11:13,411
They're your responsibility now.
301
00:11:13,411 --> 00:11:15,447
That's too bad because I've
already begun drinking.
302
00:11:15,447 --> 00:11:16,781
Oh, yeah?
303
00:11:16,781 --> 00:11:17,882
- Uh-huh.
- So have I.
304
00:11:17,882 --> 00:11:19,517
- No, no, no, no, no, you haven't.
- Mmm.
305
00:11:19,517 --> 00:11:21,453
- Stop it.
- Mmm.
306
00:11:21,453 --> 00:11:23,129
- Let go of that. Stop it.
- Don't grab it.
307
00:11:23,129 --> 00:11:23,988
Let go, Sabrina.
308
00:11:23,988 --> 00:11:25,805
Give me... Sabrina. Ow!
309
00:11:26,458 --> 00:11:27,489
Stop!
310
00:11:32,430 --> 00:11:34,463
That was a mistake.
311
00:11:54,654 --> 00:11:55,487
Oh, man, Colonel.
312
00:11:55,487 --> 00:11:57,619
You're really heavy.
313
00:12:18,157 --> 00:12:20,026
Mickey. Mickey.
314
00:12:20,026 --> 00:12:21,924
Why is that woman
staring at us like that?
315
00:12:22,812 --> 00:12:25,394
She's probably deciding which
one of us she wants to maul.
316
00:12:25,394 --> 00:12:27,066
Classic alpha behavior.
317
00:12:27,066 --> 00:12:28,934
So what do we do?
318
00:12:28,934 --> 00:12:30,102
What do we do?
319
00:12:30,102 --> 00:12:31,303
Oh, you don't anything for me
320
00:12:31,303 --> 00:12:33,531
and I don't do anything for you,
remember?
321
00:12:33,531 --> 00:12:34,940
We got a good thing going, right?
322
00:12:34,940 --> 00:12:35,975
Let's not mess with it.
323
00:12:35,975 --> 00:12:37,774
Mickey, come on. Please.
324
00:12:38,880 --> 00:12:40,943
All right, I'll make you a deal.
325
00:12:41,475 --> 00:12:43,149
You admit just how much I've sacrificed
326
00:12:43,149 --> 00:12:44,984
for your selfish, ungrateful ass
327
00:12:44,984 --> 00:12:46,816
and then maybe I'll
consider helping you out.
328
00:12:52,612 --> 00:12:53,356
Hmm?
329
00:12:55,563 --> 00:12:56,623
Really?
330
00:12:58,146 --> 00:12:58,898
All right, cool.
331
00:12:58,898 --> 00:13:01,100
If you'll excuse me,
I've got to go assert my dominance.
332
00:13:01,100 --> 00:13:02,206
Wh...
333
00:13:18,884 --> 00:13:21,050
Anybody got a match?
334
00:13:22,190 --> 00:13:22,988
Dang.
335
00:13:22,988 --> 00:13:24,190
Mm, that's not right.
336
00:13:24,190 --> 00:13:26,122
Oh, we are thick as thieves,
Mickey and me.
337
00:13:27,993 --> 00:13:31,160
You know, on paper,
it does not seem like it would work,
338
00:13:32,076 --> 00:13:34,166
probably because we are both alphas,
339
00:13:34,166 --> 00:13:36,936
but somehow it does
340
00:13:36,936 --> 00:13:40,837
because we respect each other so much.
341
00:13:44,942 --> 00:13:47,944
Well, rat, that is the end of it.
342
00:13:48,699 --> 00:13:51,781
No, no, no, don't go, my friend!
343
00:13:54,875 --> 00:13:56,155
Hello?
344
00:13:56,155 --> 00:13:58,888
Mickey? Sabrina?
345
00:13:59,696 --> 00:14:01,124
Ben? Anybody home?
346
00:14:02,795 --> 00:14:04,193
Finally!
347
00:14:19,111 --> 00:14:21,210
Whoopsie-daisy.
348
00:14:35,094 --> 00:14:37,129
Oh, are you boys
looking for a good time?
349
00:14:37,129 --> 00:14:39,228
We're already having a great time,
but thanks.
350
00:15:26,872 --> 00:15:27,613
Jimmy?
351
00:15:27,613 --> 00:15:30,783
There you are.
We were wondering where you went.
352
00:15:30,783 --> 00:15:32,851
How many beers have you had?
353
00:15:32,851 --> 00:15:34,850
Just leave me alone, all right?
354
00:15:35,708 --> 00:15:36,658
All right.
355
00:15:36,658 --> 00:15:38,154
Whatever you want.
356
00:15:39,042 --> 00:15:41,023
I'm not homophobic, you know.
357
00:15:42,258 --> 00:15:43,062
What?
358
00:15:43,062 --> 00:15:44,263
I said I'm not a...
359
00:15:44,263 --> 00:15:46,028
Get in the car.
360
00:15:56,608 --> 00:15:59,778
I said I'm not homophobic.
361
00:15:59,778 --> 00:16:01,546
I just don't like liars.
362
00:16:01,546 --> 00:16:03,715
I'm sorry I didn't know I needed
to announce that I was gay.
363
00:16:03,715 --> 00:16:05,084
Yeah, then, how was I supposed to know?
364
00:16:05,084 --> 00:16:06,785
You never told me you were straight.
365
00:16:06,785 --> 00:16:07,819
Please.
366
00:16:07,819 --> 00:16:09,487
As if I could hide it.
367
00:16:09,487 --> 00:16:12,321
What's going on, man?
368
00:16:13,146 --> 00:16:15,427
You wouldn't understand.
369
00:16:15,427 --> 00:16:17,072
Okay.
370
00:16:17,072 --> 00:16:20,242
- You don't have to talk about it...
- When I was 13,
371
00:16:20,242 --> 00:16:22,244
I had this friend named Anderson.
372
00:16:22,244 --> 00:16:25,114
And we'd spend all day just
kicking the snot out of each other.
373
00:16:25,114 --> 00:16:26,982
Then, at night,
we'd go swimming, and we'd lie
374
00:16:26,982 --> 00:16:30,152
on the docks,
and we'd talk about our dreams.
375
00:16:30,152 --> 00:16:33,736
You know, all the girls we
were gonna suck face with.
376
00:16:33,736 --> 00:16:35,557
Then, one night, Anderson says
377
00:16:35,557 --> 00:16:39,261
maybe we should practice
kissing on each other.
378
00:16:39,261 --> 00:16:41,260
So we spent all night practicing.
379
00:16:41,901 --> 00:16:43,091
And we got good.
380
00:16:43,091 --> 00:16:46,762
I mean, really good, you know?
All the...
381
00:16:46,762 --> 00:16:49,631
And then, the summer ends,
and Anderson goes home,
382
00:16:49,631 --> 00:16:53,635
and a couple months later,
I find out he's got a boyfriend.
383
00:16:53,635 --> 00:16:55,737
And he's totally homosexual.
384
00:16:55,737 --> 00:16:58,540
And our entire relationship
is based on a lie.
385
00:16:58,540 --> 00:17:02,207
And now, it's happening again.
386
00:17:03,578 --> 00:17:08,617
Jimmy, do you ever consider
maybe you're gay?
387
00:17:08,617 --> 00:17:10,685
Yeah.
388
00:17:10,685 --> 00:17:12,721
I've thought about that a lot.
389
00:17:12,721 --> 00:17:15,724
Unfortunately,
I think having sex with dudes is gross.
390
00:17:15,724 --> 00:17:18,293
- No offense.
- All good.
391
00:17:18,293 --> 00:17:20,662
I think having sex with women is gross.
392
00:17:20,662 --> 00:17:23,565
It's weird, you know?
393
00:17:23,565 --> 00:17:27,536
We're so different, but we're alike.
394
00:17:27,536 --> 00:17:29,404
Man.
395
00:17:29,404 --> 00:17:34,276
Look, I'm sorry you had that
really weird experience,
396
00:17:34,276 --> 00:17:36,511
but I'm not Anderson.
397
00:17:36,511 --> 00:17:40,282
And I hope that we can still be friends.
398
00:17:40,282 --> 00:17:41,647
Cool?
399
00:17:44,719 --> 00:17:46,585
Cool.
400
00:17:47,340 --> 00:17:48,557
Hey.
401
00:17:48,557 --> 00:17:50,589
Do you mind if I
masturbate in front of you?
402
00:17:51,309 --> 00:17:52,427
What?
403
00:17:52,427 --> 00:17:53,425
I'm kidding.
404
00:18:01,570 --> 00:18:03,235
Oh, man, that's classic.
405
00:18:05,673 --> 00:18:07,408
- Ouch!
- Oh, shut up!
406
00:18:07,408 --> 00:18:09,509
- Dolls don't talk.
- Sorry.
407
00:18:09,509 --> 00:18:11,278
Mickey, a little help here?
408
00:18:11,278 --> 00:18:12,646
You know the magic words.
409
00:18:12,646 --> 00:18:15,349
Okay, fine. I appreciate you.
410
00:18:15,349 --> 00:18:17,346
Oh, yeah? That's a sweet thing to say.
411
00:18:17,346 --> 00:18:19,453
- For what?
- For all the stuff you do for us.
412
00:18:19,453 --> 00:18:21,688
Yeah, I-I drink a lot,
so my memory's pretty hazy.
413
00:18:21,688 --> 00:18:24,558
You know? Can you remind
me what it is I do for you?
414
00:18:24,558 --> 00:18:27,461
You live in our mansion and
eat all of our food.
415
00:18:27,461 --> 00:18:29,396
You know who else has great braids?
416
00:18:29,396 --> 00:18:30,564
- Allen Iverson.
- What?
417
00:18:30,564 --> 00:18:32,399
No, no. No. No. Fine. Okay.
418
00:18:32,399 --> 00:18:33,700
Okay.
419
00:18:33,700 --> 00:18:36,370
I appreciate you because
you're our guardian,
420
00:18:36,370 --> 00:18:38,705
and-and you teach us so much cool stuff
421
00:18:38,705 --> 00:18:40,440
about life or whatever.
422
00:18:40,440 --> 00:18:41,541
I really do, don't I?
423
00:18:41,541 --> 00:18:43,540
- Yeah.
- Yeah. What else?
424
00:18:44,458 --> 00:18:47,347
Okay. I appreciate you for leaving
your entire life behind,
425
00:18:47,347 --> 00:18:49,516
that I'm sure was super
awesome and exciting
426
00:18:49,516 --> 00:18:51,351
and not at all trashy,
427
00:18:51,351 --> 00:18:54,421
to take care of three ungrateful brats
428
00:18:54,421 --> 00:18:55,722
whose lives would be doomed
429
00:18:55,722 --> 00:18:58,291
if it weren't for you
being their leader.
430
00:18:58,291 --> 00:19:00,694
Well, that is very big of you to say.
431
00:19:00,694 --> 00:19:02,359
I appreciate that.
432
00:19:02,900 --> 00:19:05,262
All right, beat it.
I want to play with her for a while.
433
00:19:08,366 --> 00:19:10,670
I'm keeping this one.
434
00:19:10,670 --> 00:19:12,339
- What?
- She earned it.
435
00:19:12,339 --> 00:19:13,407
You know, to be fair.
436
00:19:13,407 --> 00:19:15,409
Pemberton, Molng.
437
00:19:15,409 --> 00:19:16,476
You're free to go.
438
00:19:16,476 --> 00:19:17,577
Oh.
439
00:19:17,577 --> 00:19:19,446
Oh, man, only a few more seconds,
440
00:19:19,446 --> 00:19:21,515
and you wouldn't have had
to say any of that stuff.
441
00:19:21,515 --> 00:19:23,417
Whatever. I just want to go home.
442
00:19:23,417 --> 00:19:26,753
Yeah, I should probably clock
back in at the dream factory.
443
00:19:26,753 --> 00:19:28,488
- Huh.
- It's too bad, too.
444
00:19:28,488 --> 00:19:30,028
I was enjoying the peace and quiet.
445
00:19:30,028 --> 00:19:33,593
Well, hey, if you want
to hang out for a few hours,
446
00:19:33,593 --> 00:19:35,595
I can hold down the fort, I guess.
447
00:19:35,595 --> 00:19:37,731
- Really?
- Yeah. You know,
448
00:19:37,731 --> 00:19:39,696
at least, until Alba comes back.
449
00:19:40,459 --> 00:19:42,599
Thanks.
450
00:19:43,285 --> 00:19:45,539
What do you think? Is it cool if
I post up here for a few hours?
451
00:19:45,539 --> 00:19:47,574
No, it's not cool.
Unless you've done something wrong,
452
00:19:47,574 --> 00:19:48,775
you have to go.
453
00:19:48,775 --> 00:19:50,510
You-you want me to spit
in your face or something?
454
00:19:50,510 --> 00:19:51,575
Will that do the trick?
455
00:19:54,614 --> 00:19:56,416
Have fun.
456
00:19:56,416 --> 00:19:58,452
I'll see you at home.
457
00:19:58,452 --> 00:19:59,586
Get out of here.
458
00:19:59,586 --> 00:20:01,585
My spot.
459
00:20:02,190 --> 00:20:05,422
Oh, yeah.
460
00:20:08,379 --> 00:20:09,362
Hi, Sabrina.
461
00:20:09,362 --> 00:20:11,364
Hi. Where have you been?
462
00:20:11,364 --> 00:20:12,596
Oh, I've been out with the colonel.
463
00:20:20,474 --> 00:20:22,409
Good weekend?
464
00:20:22,409 --> 00:20:23,340
Fantastic.
465
00:20:24,478 --> 00:20:27,678
Benny, grab this.
466
00:20:31,785 --> 00:20:34,488
- What the hell?
- What?
467
00:20:34,488 --> 00:20:35,786
Chip? Uh...
468
00:20:37,357 --> 00:20:38,658
- Ooh.
- Chip?
469
00:20:38,658 --> 00:20:40,624
Chip?!
470
00:20:43,530 --> 00:20:44,798
- Whoa.
- Oh. Hello.
471
00:20:44,798 --> 00:20:46,700
Thank you for coming.
472
00:20:46,700 --> 00:20:47,734
Oh, God.
473
00:20:47,734 --> 00:20:49,436
Chip, are you okay?
474
00:20:49,436 --> 00:20:50,637
What happened?
475
00:20:50,637 --> 00:20:52,539
It's nothing. I'm fine.
476
00:20:52,539 --> 00:20:53,840
It was a minor accident.
477
00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:55,642
It could've happened to anyone.
478
00:20:55,642 --> 00:20:57,611
I have it all under control.
479
00:20:57,611 --> 00:20:59,409
What's "Goo"?
480
00:21:00,514 --> 00:21:01,715
Oh.
481
00:21:01,715 --> 00:21:04,651
Uh, I was writing "Good-bye,
cruel world,"
482
00:21:04,651 --> 00:21:07,225
but then, I got sleepy
and decided to take a break.
483
00:21:07,225 --> 00:21:08,555
Ben, go put some ice in a bucket.
484
00:21:08,555 --> 00:21:09,720
Sabrina, grab some towels.
485
00:21:11,324 --> 00:21:12,826
Okay. Come on, Chip.
486
00:21:12,826 --> 00:21:15,495
Get your fingers, we go to the hospital.
487
00:21:15,495 --> 00:21:17,299
Where are your fingers?!
488
00:21:17,299 --> 00:21:17,598
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