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1
00:00:07,689 --> 00:00:10,689
[ Music plays indistinctly ]All chanting "Do it" ]
2
00:00:10,689 --> 00:00:11,655
Should we do it?Let's do it!
3
00:00:11,655 --> 00:00:12,655
Let's do it!
4
00:00:12,655 --> 00:00:15,241
[ Indistinct shouting ]
5
00:00:15,241 --> 00:00:16,689
Oh!
Ohh!
6
00:00:16,689 --> 00:00:18,034
Both: Yeah!
7
00:00:18,034 --> 00:00:20,655
Oh, yeah!
8
00:00:20,655 --> 00:00:24,000
Yeah!
9
00:00:24,000 --> 00:00:25,000
Oh!
10
00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:27,068
Huh.
Whoa!
11
00:00:27,068 --> 00:00:28,896
Who-a-a-a!
12
00:00:28,896 --> 00:00:31,000
[ Chuckling ]
Y-e-eah!
13
00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:33,068
Whoa! Oh!
Oh!
14
00:00:33,068 --> 00:00:37,517
[ Both shouting ]
15
00:00:37,517 --> 00:00:41,551
♪♪
16
00:00:41,551 --> 00:00:43,448
Oh!
17
00:00:43,448 --> 00:00:46,172
Whoo!
18
00:00:46,172 --> 00:00:47,827
Oh! Yeah!
19
00:00:47,827 --> 00:00:48,965
Yeah!
20
00:00:48,965 --> 00:00:51,310
[ All cheering ][ Music ends ]
21
00:00:51,310 --> 00:00:52,586
We made a drink!
22
00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:53,965
Yeah!Man: Excuse me.
23
00:00:53,965 --> 00:00:55,724
Excuse me! Hey!
24
00:00:55,724 --> 00:00:58,413
Uh...can I get
a drink here or what.
25
00:00:58,413 --> 00:01:01,620
[ Indistinct conversations ]
26
00:01:01,620 --> 00:01:04,758
[ Music plays faintly ]
27
00:01:04,758 --> 00:01:05,896
Abbi: Here you go.
28
00:01:05,896 --> 00:01:07,482
Happy birthday,
Craig.
29
00:01:07,482 --> 00:01:09,068
Retirement.
Thanks.
30
00:01:09,068 --> 00:01:11,586
[ Chuckles ]
31
00:01:11,586 --> 00:01:12,620
Whoops!
32
00:01:12,620 --> 00:01:14,724
[ Music resumes ]
33
00:01:14,724 --> 00:01:16,620
Ooh!
34
00:01:16,620 --> 00:01:19,103
♪ Four and three and two
and one -- one ♪
35
00:01:19,103 --> 00:01:23,620
♪♪
36
00:01:23,620 --> 00:01:26,655
Lesley: Your ankle
is the size of a grapefruit.
37
00:01:26,655 --> 00:01:28,724
How did you not realize
it was sprained?
38
00:01:28,724 --> 00:01:30,206
I mean, by that point
in the night,
39
00:01:30,206 --> 00:01:32,310
I wasn't feeling much
[Chuckling] of anything.
40
00:01:32,310 --> 00:01:34,586
I learned that tequila
is an upper --
41
00:01:34,586 --> 00:01:36,689
I feel like it was,
like, psychological,
42
00:01:36,689 --> 00:01:38,413
like the Gazebo effect.
43
00:01:38,413 --> 00:01:40,206
Placeboeffect?
44
00:01:40,206 --> 00:01:43,137
Yeah. Yeah.
45
00:01:43,137 --> 00:01:45,241
I thought that you said
you were working.
46
00:01:45,241 --> 00:01:47,896
It was just, like,
a really lame catering gig,
47
00:01:47,896 --> 00:01:49,379
so we were, like,
trying to make the most of it.
48
00:01:49,379 --> 00:01:50,758
Mm-hmm.
49
00:01:50,758 --> 00:01:52,586
Thank you so much
for coming over, Lesley.
50
00:01:52,586 --> 00:01:54,758
You're the best
girlfriend --
51
00:01:54,758 --> 00:01:57,793
Whoa, girlfriend?
52
00:01:57,793 --> 00:02:00,931
Yeah. I mean, or partner.
I like -- You --
53
00:02:00,931 --> 00:02:02,689
I like "girlfriend."
I like girlfr--You know, this --
54
00:02:02,689 --> 00:02:04,862
I think this actually brings up
an interesting point.
55
00:02:04,862 --> 00:02:07,000
"Partner." Yeah.
"Partner" is more lesbian.
56
00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:09,965
No, no. Abbi --
Please don't -- Abbi.I -- I -- Like, I know this now.
57
00:02:09,965 --> 00:02:12,137
I actually think that...
58
00:02:12,137 --> 00:02:15,310
that we should
stop doing...
59
00:02:15,310 --> 00:02:17,517
this.
60
00:02:17,517 --> 00:02:19,000
Wait, okay. Okay.
61
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:21,448
Is this about the --
the "placebo" thing --
62
00:02:21,448 --> 00:02:28,448
No, Abbi, it's...
It's a lot bigger than that.
63
00:02:28,448 --> 00:02:29,965
♪♪
64
00:02:29,965 --> 00:02:32,103
[ Horn honks in distance ]
65
00:02:32,103 --> 00:02:33,482
♪ The mail, the mail ♪
66
00:02:33,482 --> 00:02:34,724
♪ The mail ♪
67
00:02:34,724 --> 00:02:38,482
[ Clattering ]♪ The mail ♪
68
00:02:38,482 --> 00:02:40,344
Whoa, Yale.
69
00:02:40,344 --> 00:02:41,620
Too Kavanaugh.
70
00:02:41,620 --> 00:02:43,793
Cornell? [ Laughs ]
You wish.
71
00:02:43,793 --> 00:02:45,379
Dartmouth.
Too goyish.
72
00:02:45,379 --> 00:02:46,482
[ Gasps ]
73
00:02:46,482 --> 00:02:48,827
Okay!!
74
00:02:48,827 --> 00:02:50,344
Here it is!
75
00:02:50,344 --> 00:02:52,517
Hunter freaking College, bish.
76
00:02:52,517 --> 00:02:54,517
And...
77
00:02:54,517 --> 00:02:55,517
[ Gasps ]
78
00:02:55,517 --> 00:02:58,310
[ Screams, laughs ]
79
00:02:58,310 --> 00:03:01,172
I'm in, Hunter College.
I'm freaking in!
80
00:03:01,172 --> 00:03:02,379
Master's, bitch.
81
00:03:02,379 --> 00:03:04,827
Doctorate, bitch.
MD, bitch.
82
00:03:04,827 --> 00:03:06,862
Well, Master's.
83
00:03:06,862 --> 00:03:08,689
[ Horn honks in distance ]Whoo! Grad student.
84
00:03:08,689 --> 00:03:10,758
[ Laughs ]
85
00:03:10,758 --> 00:03:15,344
Acceptance letter, mm!
Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm!
86
00:03:15,344 --> 00:03:17,551
Whoo!
87
00:03:17,551 --> 00:03:20,413
[ Keyboard clacking ]
88
00:03:20,413 --> 00:03:30,379
♪♪
89
00:03:30,379 --> 00:03:32,241
Hello.
90
00:03:32,241 --> 00:03:35,413
Can I help you?
91
00:03:35,413 --> 00:03:38,758
I hear you offer
student discounts.
92
00:03:38,758 --> 00:03:40,724
So, we can't give you
a student discount
93
00:03:40,724 --> 00:03:44,275
if you don't have a student ID,
and this isn't a student ID.
94
00:03:44,275 --> 00:03:46,551
Okay, but this says
that I willbe a student
95
00:03:46,551 --> 00:03:47,655
in like three months.
96
00:03:47,655 --> 00:03:48,827
Oh, three months?
97
00:03:48,827 --> 00:03:50,103
Oh, that's almost as long
98
00:03:50,103 --> 00:03:51,724
as we've been having
this conversation.
99
00:03:51,724 --> 00:03:54,241
Okay, Zahm Zena.
Do we have a beef?
100
00:03:54,241 --> 00:03:55,793
Oh, my God, miss?
101
00:03:55,793 --> 00:03:58,551
-Okay. Jesus. I'm leaving.
-Oh, no, you're not.
102
00:03:58,551 --> 00:04:01,344
Your hair.
It's perfect.
103
00:04:01,344 --> 00:04:04,586
The curls are so plump
yet so light.
104
00:04:04,586 --> 00:04:06,517
[ Laughs ] Moi?
105
00:04:06,517 --> 00:04:08,482
Merci beaucoup,
monsieur.
106
00:04:08,482 --> 00:04:10,103
I know this is crazy,
107
00:04:10,103 --> 00:04:13,517
but would you consider
modeling for us? Stop.
108
00:04:13,517 --> 00:04:15,482
Okay, stop. Is this some sort
of perverted prank?
109
00:04:15,482 --> 00:04:17,275
Are you in on this --
'Cause you've been a bitch the whole time?
110
00:04:17,275 --> 00:04:19,931
I know this is last-minute,
but we're doing a shoot tonight.
111
00:04:19,931 --> 00:04:23,000
[ Gasps ]
112
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:24,448
You know what?
I think that'll be good.
113
00:04:24,448 --> 00:04:26,793
Perfection --
Just like your curls.
114
00:04:26,793 --> 00:04:29,586
[ Laughs ]See you back here at 6:00 --
and be camera ready.
115
00:04:29,586 --> 00:04:32,000
Okay, 6:00 P.M.,
camera ready.
116
00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:33,827
Oh, my God,
did you see that?
117
00:04:33,827 --> 00:04:35,068
That was amazing.
118
00:04:35,068 --> 00:04:36,758
I'm on a call right now.
I can't talk.
119
00:04:36,758 --> 00:04:38,482
Okay, something seems
very locked up inside of you,
120
00:04:38,482 --> 00:04:40,586
so when you decide to change
your life with therapy,
121
00:04:40,586 --> 00:04:42,000
give mea call.
122
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:44,000
♪♪
123
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:45,482
I don't understand.
124
00:04:45,482 --> 00:04:48,655
Like, Lesley,
I-I like you so much.
125
00:04:48,655 --> 00:04:50,724
We're just not
on the same page.
126
00:04:50,724 --> 00:04:51,965
I'm a doctor.
127
00:04:51,965 --> 00:04:53,758
I do jiu-jitsu
and have hobbies.
128
00:04:53,758 --> 00:04:55,275
And you...
129
00:04:55,275 --> 00:04:57,896
You just don't really feel
like an adult yet.
130
00:04:57,896 --> 00:05:00,448
And I'm sure
your life is fun,
131
00:05:00,448 --> 00:05:04,482
but it's really just kind of
a series of wild shenanigans.
132
00:05:04,482 --> 00:05:06,827
Wow.
133
00:05:06,827 --> 00:05:08,413
Shenanigans?
134
00:05:08,413 --> 00:05:12,827
You're 20s are for...
wild "shenanigans."
135
00:05:12,827 --> 00:05:15,689
But aren't you 30?
136
00:05:15,689 --> 00:05:17,482
Wow, wow.
You're fucking nuts, Lesley!
137
00:05:17,482 --> 00:05:19,103
What?!Yeah. Yeah, you're nuts.
138
00:05:19,103 --> 00:05:22,413
I'm just saying that you need
to grow up a little bit.
139
00:05:22,413 --> 00:05:24,137
Mm. Okay. Yeah.
No, no, no. Yeah.
140
00:05:24,137 --> 00:05:25,965
You know what --
I write thank-you notes
141
00:05:25,965 --> 00:05:27,379
all the time.
142
00:05:27,379 --> 00:05:29,068
And my phone screen
isn't even cracked.
143
00:05:29,068 --> 00:05:30,827
And guess what, Lesley?
I'm going to a play today.
144
00:05:30,827 --> 00:05:32,931
I'm going to a matinée.Yeah, with Ilana's parents,
145
00:05:32,931 --> 00:05:34,586
who, I'm assuming,
paid for the tickets.
146
00:05:34,586 --> 00:05:36,517
Actually, you know what, Lesley?
I think that we're done.
147
00:05:36,517 --> 00:05:38,413
I think that you should
get out of my house.
148
00:05:38,413 --> 00:05:40,793
Finally on the same page
about something.
149
00:05:40,793 --> 00:05:44,655
You know what?
150
00:05:44,655 --> 00:05:47,896
Why don't you take
your ugly-ass hat back, too.
151
00:05:47,896 --> 00:05:49,758
Fine. I will.
152
00:05:49,758 --> 00:05:51,310
[ Scoffs ]
Of course it looks cute on you.
153
00:05:51,310 --> 00:05:53,310
Whatever.
God!
154
00:05:53,310 --> 00:05:55,862
[ Glass cracking ]Oh, shit!
155
00:05:55,862 --> 00:05:57,206
Great.
Well, thanks a lot.
156
00:05:57,206 --> 00:05:58,413
Now I dohave a crack
in my screen,
157
00:05:58,413 --> 00:05:59,689
thanks to your
stupid boot.
158
00:05:59,689 --> 00:06:01,965
Oh, did the wig not
protect it?
159
00:06:01,965 --> 00:06:03,655
[ Door slams ]
160
00:06:03,655 --> 00:06:05,689
[ Grunts ]
It didn't.
161
00:06:05,689 --> 00:06:09,241
♪♪
162
00:06:09,241 --> 00:06:13,379
DevaCurl?!
Oh, my freakin' God, Ilana!
163
00:06:13,379 --> 00:06:15,896
I know. I know!You're gonna be a model.
164
00:06:15,896 --> 00:06:18,172
I literally could not
have done this without you guys.
165
00:06:18,172 --> 00:06:20,103
[ Gasps ] Also, I got
into grad school today.
166
00:06:20,103 --> 00:06:21,482
What?
That's fantastic.
167
00:06:21,482 --> 00:06:24,310
DevaCurl! Ah! Oh!
I'm coming to the shoot.
168
00:06:24,310 --> 00:06:27,137
Of course you're coming.
You're my number-one curl inspo.
169
00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:29,551
[ Sighing ]
DevaCurl. Ah.
170
00:06:29,551 --> 00:06:31,206
DevaCurl![ Tires screeching ]
171
00:06:31,206 --> 00:06:34,034
Devacu-u-u-u...
172
00:06:34,034 --> 00:06:35,482
[ Screaming continues
in distance ]
173
00:06:35,482 --> 00:06:38,793
[ Screaming fades ]
174
00:06:38,793 --> 00:06:40,241
...uuuuuuuur--
175
00:06:42,586 --> 00:06:44,482
[ Sniffs ]
176
00:06:44,482 --> 00:06:47,724
[ Chuckles ]
LOL, NYC.
177
00:06:50,379 --> 00:06:52,206
[ Camera shutter clicks ]Yeah. That is adult.
178
00:06:52,206 --> 00:06:55,482
Whoo! She got the plaid slacks.
She got the pink sweater.
179
00:06:55,482 --> 00:06:57,206
She got the tortoise-shell
clip, bish.
180
00:06:57,206 --> 00:06:59,620
Yass! I love it!
-Oh, my gosh. Hold on.
181
00:06:59,620 --> 00:07:01,275
Is this
a grad student?
182
00:07:01,275 --> 00:07:03,172
Oh, well, mm...
Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm!
183
00:07:03,172 --> 00:07:05,413
Yes!I'm so proud of you, dude.
184
00:07:05,413 --> 00:07:07,103
Congrats![ Squeals ] Thank you!
185
00:07:07,103 --> 00:07:09,689
And you must be
my sexy professor.
186
00:07:09,689 --> 00:07:12,068
[ Chuckles ]Wow, Lesley is a true monster
187
00:07:12,068 --> 00:07:14,413
if she can break up with you
looking like this.
188
00:07:14,413 --> 00:07:16,896
Yeah, well...
she said I'm not "adult" enough
189
00:07:16,896 --> 00:07:18,413
for her, so --
Oh!
190
00:07:18,413 --> 00:07:21,275
I didn't realize
she was a fucking heinous bitch.
191
00:07:21,275 --> 00:07:23,172
She smells like
fucking shit.
192
00:07:23,172 --> 00:07:24,517
She doesn't smell
like shit.
193
00:07:24,517 --> 00:07:25,965
Always hated her --
never liked her.
194
00:07:25,965 --> 00:07:27,724
Listen, it's fine,
because I have been flooding
195
00:07:27,724 --> 00:07:30,413
my Instagram account
with adult-ass pics all day
196
00:07:30,413 --> 00:07:32,379
so she can see what
she's missing out on.
197
00:07:32,379 --> 00:07:34,931
Wow. I love it.
Hence The New Yorker.
198
00:07:34,931 --> 00:07:37,241
Hence The New Yorker,
indeed.
199
00:07:37,241 --> 00:07:39,068
Whatever.
Enough about Lesley, okay?
200
00:07:39,068 --> 00:07:41,517
Okay, so, um...
I am scared
201
00:07:41,517 --> 00:07:42,931
that my brother
is leaving the city.
202
00:07:42,931 --> 00:07:44,724
You know, I-I know
that he's obviously going
203
00:07:44,724 --> 00:07:46,896
to be the perfect
Jewish-Canadian VJ -- Wait.
204
00:07:46,896 --> 00:07:49,517
I'm sorry.
Is your eye okay?
205
00:07:49,517 --> 00:07:50,931
I'm just going for,
like, a structured
206
00:07:50,931 --> 00:07:52,793
architectural brow today.No, no.
207
00:07:52,793 --> 00:07:54,758
Like, it's red.
It looks really irritated.
208
00:07:54,758 --> 00:07:56,620
Yeah, I got this, like,
AC drop in my eye before.
209
00:07:56,620 --> 00:07:58,068
It was just, like,
air conditioning pre-cum --
210
00:07:58,068 --> 00:07:59,517
like Ninja Turtle juice.
211
00:07:59,517 --> 00:08:01,137
It's fine.
212
00:08:01,137 --> 00:08:02,793
Is it, though?
[ Stammers ]
213
00:08:02,793 --> 00:08:05,413
Yeah, I'll just flush it out
when I cry at the play later.
214
00:08:05,413 --> 00:08:07,896
[ Gasps ]
O-o-oh!
215
00:08:07,896 --> 00:08:10,586
[ Laughs ]
Oh, my God!
216
00:08:10,586 --> 00:08:14,000
I didn't tell you
the best news of all.
217
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:17,931
Lordy, lordy...
♪ 'Cause Janet be 40 ♪
218
00:08:17,931 --> 00:08:21,586
Yep, yep, yep, yep!
Whoo-whoo!
219
00:08:21,586 --> 00:08:24,172
What?
Girl, I got scouted...
220
00:08:24,172 --> 00:08:26,827
to model...
for Devachan.
221
00:08:26,827 --> 00:08:28,931
Okay? Whoo!
222
00:08:28,931 --> 00:08:30,655
This is the Vision Board.That's it.
223
00:08:30,655 --> 00:08:31,655
Yes!Yes!
224
00:08:31,655 --> 00:08:33,793
[ Both laugh ]
225
00:08:33,793 --> 00:08:39,137
♪♪
226
00:08:39,137 --> 00:08:41,413
[ Indistinct talking ]
227
00:08:41,413 --> 00:08:44,413
[ Horn blares in distance ]Oh, here she is!
228
00:08:44,413 --> 00:08:49,344
My star --
my DevaCurl star.
229
00:08:49,344 --> 00:08:50,793
No, we had
a wild night.
230
00:08:50,793 --> 00:08:53,827
Eliot, your sister
is a DevaCurl hair model!
231
00:08:53,827 --> 00:08:55,931
I mean, this is really,
very exciting
232
00:08:55,931 --> 00:08:57,517
about the modeling,
but, please...[ Cellphone shutter clicking ]
233
00:08:57,517 --> 00:09:00,137
...let us not forget
this is Eliot's special day.
234
00:09:00,137 --> 00:09:02,344
[ Voice breaking ]
It is bon voyage to New York.
235
00:09:02,344 --> 00:09:03,931
My favorite neighborhood,
no less...
236
00:09:03,931 --> 00:09:06,034
the Theater District.[ Horn honks in distance ]
237
00:09:06,034 --> 00:09:07,896
Would it kill you to put
a smile on your pretty face?[ Clicks continue ]
238
00:09:07,896 --> 00:09:10,344
You have a simply
spectacular smile...
239
00:09:10,344 --> 00:09:12,689
my sweet baby.Hey, hey, hey, lady.
240
00:09:12,689 --> 00:09:14,000
You want a picture
with my daughter?
241
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:16,000
She's a very famous
hair model.
242
00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:17,827
Can we just go inside,
please?
243
00:09:17,827 --> 00:09:19,896
Yeah, you know,
we got to cash in on this, El.
244
00:09:19,896 --> 00:09:21,482
I mean, one of those
whats-their-faces
245
00:09:21,482 --> 00:09:23,896
is worth, like,
a billion dollars.
246
00:09:23,896 --> 00:09:25,827
Ilana: You know,
you really should be
247
00:09:25,827 --> 00:09:28,034
putting weight
on the good foot.
248
00:09:28,034 --> 00:09:30,034
Yeah, but it's --
I wanted the heel,
249
00:09:30,034 --> 00:09:31,896
so it just, like, works.
250
00:09:31,896 --> 00:09:34,482
Look at how fast you're going.
Good job.
251
00:09:34,482 --> 00:09:37,137
Hey, girls.
252
00:09:37,137 --> 00:09:40,172
Hungry?[ Both laugh ]
253
00:09:40,172 --> 00:09:41,344
She's a professional.
254
00:09:41,344 --> 00:09:50,241
♪♪
255
00:09:50,241 --> 00:09:59,206
♪♪
256
00:09:59,206 --> 00:10:01,827
Someone's making
a dank Instagram story.
257
00:10:01,827 --> 00:10:03,758
Yes, it's a story
about a grown
258
00:10:03,758 --> 00:10:06,379
[Victorian English accent]
woman at the theater.
259
00:10:06,379 --> 00:10:07,827
[Victorian English accent]
Theater, yes.
260
00:10:07,827 --> 00:10:09,896
-It's starting.
-Damn it.
261
00:10:09,896 --> 00:10:11,482
♪♪
262
00:10:11,482 --> 00:10:15,206
Man: I'm so sick
of this attic!
263
00:10:15,206 --> 00:10:18,034
Walk it off, Anne Frank!
264
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,482
Shh!
265
00:10:19,482 --> 00:10:22,655
♪♪
266
00:10:22,655 --> 00:10:24,379
[ Applause ]
267
00:10:24,379 --> 00:10:25,827
Announcer: Please enjoy
a brief intermission.Wow.
268
00:10:25,827 --> 00:10:27,827
[ Voice breaking ] Wow.
[ Inhales sharply ]
269
00:10:27,827 --> 00:10:29,241
They're gonna win
that Tony.
270
00:10:29,241 --> 00:10:34,551
Oh, my God. Dude...
Does your eye stink?
271
00:10:34,551 --> 00:10:35,827
[ Squelch ]
272
00:10:35,827 --> 00:10:37,241
[ Sniffs ] Hoo!
273
00:10:37,241 --> 00:10:39,379
Yeah, it stinks.What's going --
274
00:10:39,379 --> 00:10:41,379
Holy shit!
Ilana...
275
00:10:41,379 --> 00:10:43,241
[ Sniffs ] It smells
like prosciutt.
276
00:10:43,241 --> 00:10:45,379
You cannot go to
the DevaCurl shoot like this.
277
00:10:45,379 --> 00:10:46,758
You got to go to a doctor
right away
278
00:10:46,758 --> 00:10:49,379
and get this cleared up,
for the family honor!
279
00:10:49,379 --> 00:10:51,137
Doctor? I don't have
a "doctor" "here."
280
00:10:51,137 --> 00:10:52,655
Wait, you don't have
a doctor here?
281
00:10:52,655 --> 00:10:54,724
No one in the city does.
That's why it's a cesspool.
282
00:10:54,724 --> 00:10:56,517
All right, it's an emergency!
Go to the emergency room.
283
00:10:56,517 --> 00:10:58,068
Go to St. Vincent's.
-It's condos.
284
00:10:58,068 --> 00:10:59,689
-All right, so Cabrini!
-Also condos.
285
00:10:59,689 --> 00:11:01,551
How 'bout that what's-his-name
doctor on Houston St.?
286
00:11:01,551 --> 00:11:03,000
It's not condos,
but it's a Whole Foods.
287
00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:04,724
[ Sighs ]
Again, why do you love this city?
288
00:11:04,724 --> 00:11:06,103
[ Coughs ]
You got to get an ambulance.
289
00:11:06,103 --> 00:11:08,034
You -- You smell like
a dog's ass.
290
00:11:08,034 --> 00:11:08,862
What'd you say?
291
00:11:08,862 --> 00:11:09,793
A dog's ass.
292
00:11:09,793 --> 00:11:11,551
Dog's ass --
That's it?
293
00:11:11,551 --> 00:11:13,310
What?
Mwah!
294
00:11:13,310 --> 00:11:15,241
Dude...Okay, I know who can cure me.
I got this.
295
00:11:15,241 --> 00:11:16,793
Oh, I hope so.
296
00:11:16,793 --> 00:11:19,206
♪ Uh ♪Oh, God.
297
00:11:19,206 --> 00:11:22,862
...!
Come on.
298
00:11:22,862 --> 00:11:29,000
♪♪
299
00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:31,310
Hey, can you drive me downtown
and just weave
300
00:11:31,310 --> 00:11:32,620
in and out of traffic
very fast?
301
00:11:32,620 --> 00:11:34,379
Listen,
I'm not a pedicab driver.
302
00:11:34,379 --> 00:11:36,275
I'm a real estate broker.
Read the sign.
303
00:11:36,275 --> 00:11:38,103
[ Horn honks ]Okay, then why do you
have a pedicab?
304
00:11:38,103 --> 00:11:39,931
It's the fastest way
to get clients
305
00:11:39,931 --> 00:11:41,896
to apartments
for multiple viewing.
306
00:11:41,896 --> 00:11:44,379
You know, I think
I-I know you.
307
00:11:44,379 --> 00:11:46,172
Are you a cop?
No.
308
00:11:46,172 --> 00:11:49,206
Oh.But you showed my friend and I
an apartment years ago,
309
00:11:49,206 --> 00:11:50,827
a bunch of shitty apartment.
310
00:11:50,827 --> 00:11:53,310
I mean, they were
all literal crime scenes.
311
00:11:53,310 --> 00:11:55,482
Oh, yeah, crime scene homes
are my speciality.
312
00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:57,724
You know, I got an ex
that works in the NYPD.
313
00:11:57,724 --> 00:11:59,241
He hooks me up.
314
00:11:59,241 --> 00:12:00,827
I just give him a hand job
once and a while.
315
00:12:00,827 --> 00:12:02,793
Okay, since we have a history
can I please get a ride?
316
00:12:02,793 --> 00:12:04,724
This is a modeling
emergency.
317
00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:06,965
Look, I've been pedaling
my butt off all day.
318
00:12:06,965 --> 00:12:08,172
I mean, look at my feet.
319
00:12:08,172 --> 00:12:10,655
Oh, Jesus Christ.
320
00:12:10,655 --> 00:12:12,620
Wait a minute.
Flex that thigh.
321
00:12:12,620 --> 00:12:14,206
Whoopsie!
322
00:12:14,206 --> 00:12:15,724
I can see your short
and curlies.
323
00:12:15,724 --> 00:12:17,103
[ Laughs ]
Let's go!
324
00:12:17,103 --> 00:12:18,275
[ Grunts ]
325
00:12:18,275 --> 00:12:19,482
[ Bell dings ]Damn.
326
00:12:19,482 --> 00:12:21,034
There you go.
You got it.
327
00:12:21,034 --> 00:12:23,103
You should see your ass
from back here.
328
00:12:23,103 --> 00:12:26,275
It's amazing.
It looks like a big heart.
329
00:12:26,275 --> 00:12:29,344
Thank you, Pam --
Move! Scram! Oh, let's go!
330
00:12:29,344 --> 00:12:31,137
We have a medical
emergency!
331
00:12:31,137 --> 00:12:33,206
Look out for the baby --
the baby!Get out of the way!
332
00:12:33,206 --> 00:12:34,310
[ Screams ]
333
00:12:34,310 --> 00:12:37,206
[ Clattering ]
334
00:12:37,206 --> 00:12:40,172
Well, well, well, Lesley.[ Cellphone shutter clicking ]
335
00:12:40,172 --> 00:12:42,655
One of these babies
could've been yours.
336
00:12:42,655 --> 00:12:44,689
[ Smacks lips ] Shit.
337
00:12:44,689 --> 00:12:46,793
Lighting is terrible
in here.
338
00:12:46,793 --> 00:12:50,103
Gotta find another
light...source.
339
00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:53,965
[ Indistinct talking
in distance ]
340
00:12:53,965 --> 00:12:55,655
[ Groans ]
341
00:12:55,655 --> 00:13:00,206
[ Music plays in distance ]
342
00:13:00,206 --> 00:13:02,172
Yes! Daylight.
343
00:13:02,172 --> 00:13:03,448
[ Grunts ]
344
00:13:03,448 --> 00:13:04,862
Here we go.
345
00:13:04,862 --> 00:13:07,413
Lesley's not gonna know
what hit her.
346
00:13:07,413 --> 00:13:09,448
[ Cellphone shutter clicks ][ Screams ]
347
00:13:09,448 --> 00:13:11,758
[ Groans, screams ]
348
00:13:11,758 --> 00:13:13,862
[ Panting ]
349
00:13:13,862 --> 00:13:16,517
[ Siren wails in distance ]
350
00:13:16,517 --> 00:13:19,000
Shenanigans.
[ Sighs ]
351
00:13:21,137 --> 00:13:22,448
[ Groans ]
Oh, sh--
352
00:13:22,448 --> 00:13:23,689
Okay.
353
00:13:23,689 --> 00:13:26,206
[ Cellphone vibrates ]
354
00:13:26,206 --> 00:13:27,862
Oh, my God. Yes.
355
00:13:27,862 --> 00:13:31,206
Ah! Yes!
356
00:13:31,206 --> 00:13:32,379
Ow!
357
00:13:32,379 --> 00:13:34,482
Hello? Somebody?
358
00:13:34,482 --> 00:13:35,827
H-Hello?
359
00:13:35,827 --> 00:13:38,137
Abbi?
It's Lesley.
360
00:13:38,137 --> 00:13:43,448
[ Exhales sharply ]
Hey. Lesley.
361
00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:45,137
[ Laughs ]
362
00:13:45,137 --> 00:13:47,758
What's up...girl?
363
00:13:47,758 --> 00:13:51,137
♪♪
364
00:13:51,137 --> 00:13:52,620
[ Dogs barking in distance ]
365
00:13:52,620 --> 00:13:54,034
Okay, I'm sorry.
366
00:13:54,034 --> 00:13:56,137
I have to go before you.
I'm a model.
367
00:13:56,137 --> 00:13:57,517
[ Sighs ]
368
00:13:57,517 --> 00:14:00,827
The doctor's with a patient!Yeah, I'm a model.
369
00:14:00,827 --> 00:14:03,172
S-Stop!
370
00:14:03,172 --> 00:14:05,034
Doctor --
Ohh! Sorry.
371
00:14:05,034 --> 00:14:06,620
Ilana, I told you --
372
00:14:06,620 --> 00:14:10,034
I can not spay-neuter a human,
and it is not reversible.
373
00:14:10,034 --> 00:14:12,517
No, I-I Googled that --
you were right about it.
374
00:14:12,517 --> 00:14:14,103
[ Inhales sharply ]
I'm here about this.
375
00:14:14,103 --> 00:14:15,586
♪♪
376
00:14:15,586 --> 00:14:18,379
Ugh. Okay.[ Dog whines ]
377
00:14:18,379 --> 00:14:20,896
That looks bad.
Have a seat.
378
00:14:20,896 --> 00:14:22,724
Okay, good girl.
Good girl.[ Dog whimpers ]
379
00:14:22,724 --> 00:14:24,275
[Groaning ] Good --
Good girl!
380
00:14:24,275 --> 00:14:27,931
Well, I actually wanted
to apologize to you.
381
00:14:27,931 --> 00:14:29,379
For before.
382
00:14:29,379 --> 00:14:31,344
[ Panting ]
Oh, yeah, yeah.
383
00:14:31,344 --> 00:14:32,862
Oh, did you see
my Instagram?
384
00:14:32,862 --> 00:14:33,827
[ Chuckles ]
385
00:14:33,827 --> 00:14:35,000
What?
386
00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,034
Never mind.
Wh-Wh-What's up?
387
00:14:37,034 --> 00:14:43,586
Look, the truth is,
I'm really set in my ways,
388
00:14:43,586 --> 00:14:46,689
and maybe I'm self-sabotaging
this whole things
389
00:14:46,689 --> 00:14:49,344
because I have a lot
of fun with you --
390
00:14:49,344 --> 00:14:50,965
shenanigans and all.
391
00:14:50,965 --> 00:14:53,310
I mean, who am I
to judge the way you live?
392
00:14:53,310 --> 00:14:55,206
You know, you're --
you're figuring it out.[ Horn honks in distance ]
393
00:14:55,206 --> 00:14:59,068
[ Exhales sharply ] Wow.
Well, thanks --
394
00:14:59,068 --> 00:15:00,517
I mean, thank you
for saying that.
395
00:15:00,517 --> 00:15:02,758
I -- [ Sighs ]
396
00:15:02,758 --> 00:15:05,137
You really hurt my feelings
this morning.
397
00:15:05,137 --> 00:15:07,931
I know,
and I'm so sorry.
398
00:15:07,931 --> 00:15:11,793
Do you think there's any way
that we can try this again?
399
00:15:11,793 --> 00:15:13,758
You mean, like,
get back together?
400
00:15:13,758 --> 00:15:16,310
Yes. I'd really like
to keep seeing you, Abbi.
401
00:15:16,310 --> 00:15:17,758
I think you're great.
402
00:15:17,758 --> 00:15:19,482
Well, I think
you're great, too.
403
00:15:19,482 --> 00:15:23,827
I mean, [grunts]
what are you, uh...
404
00:15:23,827 --> 00:15:27,896
What are you
doing tonight?
405
00:15:27,896 --> 00:15:30,620
Well, I think
I may have a date
406
00:15:30,620 --> 00:15:34,586
with my very adult,
very sexy artist girlfriend.
407
00:15:34,586 --> 00:15:37,793
Yeah. I mean,
I'm down to...
408
00:15:37,793 --> 00:15:39,448
hang.
409
00:15:39,448 --> 00:15:43,344
Um, before we lock in
any logistics...
410
00:15:43,344 --> 00:15:46,034
I've, u-um...
411
00:15:46,034 --> 00:15:48,551
gotten myself in
a little bit of trouble.
412
00:15:48,551 --> 00:15:50,517
[ Laughs ]
413
00:15:50,517 --> 00:15:53,862
But, uh, I do need --
I do need you to call 9-1-1.
414
00:15:53,862 --> 00:15:55,655
What? And then you know what?
415
00:15:55,655 --> 00:15:58,068
You pick dinner.
It's totally on you.
416
00:15:58,068 --> 00:15:59,448
I'm cool with whatever.
417
00:15:59,448 --> 00:16:01,689
Jesus Christ, Abbi.
418
00:16:01,689 --> 00:16:04,551
[ Dogs barking in distance ]You know, I've gotten
New York City water droplets
419
00:16:04,551 --> 00:16:06,482
in my mouth before,
and I was fine.
420
00:16:06,482 --> 00:16:09,206
I did have bloody stool
for a week or two,
421
00:16:09,206 --> 00:16:11,137
but that's pretty typical
for me in the summer.
422
00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:13,344
Well, thisis
conjunctivitis.
423
00:16:13,344 --> 00:16:14,827
No!
Yes.
424
00:16:14,827 --> 00:16:16,758
You cannot get any closer
than this to anyone.
425
00:16:16,758 --> 00:16:18,551
Please!
I have a photoshoot tonight.
426
00:16:18,551 --> 00:16:19,896
What if I'm paired
with a curly-haired,
427
00:16:19,896 --> 00:16:21,724
non-binary model,
and it's a love scene?
428
00:16:21,724 --> 00:16:23,206
And a little bit of a pinch.Mm!
429
00:16:23,206 --> 00:16:24,862
One, two, three.
430
00:16:24,862 --> 00:16:27,034
Okay.
Hey! Thank you. [ Inhales sharply ]
431
00:16:27,034 --> 00:16:28,413
Okay, so this is gonna
clear up my eye
432
00:16:28,413 --> 00:16:30,206
and make me "gorgus"
for the evening.
433
00:16:30,206 --> 00:16:33,413
No, that's your third round
of Hep B shots. Oh.
434
00:16:33,413 --> 00:16:35,310
You have another one scheduled
for next month. Okay.
435
00:16:35,310 --> 00:16:36,655
I'm gonna write you
a prescription.
436
00:16:36,655 --> 00:16:38,310
And this is gonna
clear your eye up
437
00:16:38,310 --> 00:16:39,965
in about two weeks.
438
00:16:39,965 --> 00:16:42,862
Two fuggin' weeks?!
No, no, no!
439
00:16:42,862 --> 00:16:44,965
Look, honey,
I'm a model now,
440
00:16:44,965 --> 00:16:47,034
and this here
is my money maker.
441
00:16:47,034 --> 00:16:48,724
Don't you have
something quicker, like...
442
00:16:48,724 --> 00:16:51,241
bovine growth hormone that
Madonna shoves up her crack?
443
00:16:51,241 --> 00:16:53,655
I need something that will
clear me up tonight.Shh, shh, shh, shh!
444
00:16:53,655 --> 00:16:55,413
There is one option.[ Dance music plays ]
445
00:16:55,413 --> 00:16:57,000
Louis: Work those curls, Mama.[ Camera shutter clicking ]
446
00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:59,068
Nasty little duet. Yeah!
447
00:16:59,068 --> 00:17:00,758
Kinky, kinky.
448
00:17:00,758 --> 00:17:03,310
Give me a...realness.
Volume, volume.
449
00:17:03,310 --> 00:17:06,586
Yes. Work it, Mama.
Yeah, Shirley Temple.
450
00:17:06,586 --> 00:17:08,862
Now lose the glasses, baby.
451
00:17:08,862 --> 00:17:11,310
♪♪
452
00:17:11,310 --> 00:17:12,793
Uh --
Cut the music!
453
00:17:12,793 --> 00:17:14,206
[ Music stops ]What's with the patch?
454
00:17:14,206 --> 00:17:15,448
What is this?
455
00:17:15,448 --> 00:17:17,689
Today I'm serving, um...
456
00:17:17,689 --> 00:17:19,275
"Kill Bill" realness.
457
00:17:19,275 --> 00:17:21,413
Yeah, more like
Bob Costas realness.
458
00:17:21,413 --> 00:17:23,413
Lose the patch.
459
00:17:23,413 --> 00:17:26,137
You don't want to see
what's under here.
460
00:17:26,137 --> 00:17:27,482
Well, then
the shoot's over.
461
00:17:27,482 --> 00:17:28,793
Whoa, whoa.
What's the problem?
462
00:17:28,793 --> 00:17:30,068
Uh, and who are you?
463
00:17:30,068 --> 00:17:32,793
I'm the manager/mother.Stop it.
464
00:17:32,793 --> 00:17:35,103
You're curls make
your daughter's curls
465
00:17:35,103 --> 00:17:36,551
look like trash.
466
00:17:36,551 --> 00:17:40,068
The rare triple helix --
the Holy Grail of curls.
467
00:17:40,068 --> 00:17:41,586
You must sleep
sitting up.
468
00:17:41,586 --> 00:17:43,758
Of course I do,
I'm not an animal.
469
00:17:43,758 --> 00:17:46,206
This is really last minute,
but we're totally in a bind.
470
00:17:46,206 --> 00:17:48,931
You could save the day.
471
00:17:49,931 --> 00:17:52,034
♪ You better work♪
472
00:17:52,034 --> 00:17:55,103
Whoo!
You own everything.
473
00:17:55,103 --> 00:17:58,655
Louis Vuitton,
CHANEL.
474
00:17:58,655 --> 00:18:03,103
All right...
Yaas! Slay Curl Kween!
475
00:18:03,103 --> 00:18:05,517
[ Voice breaking ]
For the family honor.
476
00:18:05,517 --> 00:18:07,206
[ Abbi sighs ]
477
00:18:07,206 --> 00:18:09,517
"The cast is electric"?
478
00:18:09,517 --> 00:18:13,310
What an idiot.
479
00:18:13,310 --> 00:18:14,448
[ Sighs ]
480
00:18:19,172 --> 00:18:20,344
Huh.
481
00:18:20,344 --> 00:18:22,448
[ Horn honks in distance ]
482
00:18:25,620 --> 00:18:27,517
♪ Doo, doo, doo ♪
483
00:18:27,517 --> 00:18:29,344
♪ Daa ♪Wow.
484
00:18:29,344 --> 00:18:31,068
♪ Daa daa ♪♪ Doo ♪
485
00:18:31,068 --> 00:18:34,206
♪ Daa daa daa ♪♪ Doo, doo ♪
486
00:18:34,206 --> 00:18:37,000
♪ Daa daa ♪♪ Doo, doo, doo ♪
487
00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:41,103
♪ Daa, daa-daa-daa-daa ♪♪ Doo, doo, doo, doo ♪
488
00:18:41,103 --> 00:18:42,551
♪ Daa ♪♪ Doo, doo ♪
489
00:18:42,551 --> 00:18:44,379
♪ Daa daa ♪♪ Doo ♪
490
00:18:44,379 --> 00:18:47,655
♪ Daa, daa-daa-daa-daa ♪♪ Doo, doo, doo ♪
491
00:18:47,655 --> 00:18:50,379
♪ Daa daa-daa ♪♪ Doo, doo ♪
492
00:18:50,379 --> 00:18:51,793
♪ Doo ♪
493
00:18:51,793 --> 00:18:54,379
♪ Doo, doo, doo ♪
494
00:18:54,379 --> 00:18:55,551
♪ Daa ♪♪ Doo, doo ♪
495
00:18:55,551 --> 00:19:00,103
♪ I would love to ♪
496
00:19:00,103 --> 00:19:02,137
♪ Scream ♪
497
00:19:05,758 --> 00:19:08,827
Okay, so this psycho dumped you
a second time in one day
498
00:19:08,827 --> 00:19:11,344
while you're hanging
between two buildings,
499
00:19:11,344 --> 00:19:13,482
two stories
above concrete?
500
00:19:13,482 --> 00:19:15,482
This bitch is a menace.
Right?
501
00:19:15,482 --> 00:19:16,862
But then there
was, like,
502
00:19:16,862 --> 00:19:18,620
this fire woman
that was rescuing me.
503
00:19:18,620 --> 00:19:21,275
She was, like, carrying me down,
and I was, like...
504
00:19:23,793 --> 00:19:25,655
"Who are you?"
Like, she was hot.
505
00:19:25,655 --> 00:19:28,137
Yas.
It's cool that I can see that now.
506
00:19:28,137 --> 00:19:32,137
I mean, the female form --
God's hottest creation.
507
00:19:32,137 --> 00:19:33,931
Oh, yeah --
"Made in Her image."
508
00:19:33,931 --> 00:19:36,793
Hmm?
It's a Catholic thing.
509
00:19:36,793 --> 00:19:39,344
Man, I'm just so bummed
my modeling career
510
00:19:39,344 --> 00:19:40,689
is over before
it started.
511
00:19:40,689 --> 00:19:43,931
But my mom was
incredible.
512
00:19:43,931 --> 00:19:45,413
Wow.
She slayed.
513
00:19:45,413 --> 00:19:46,793
I got to show you.
Oh, my God.
514
00:19:46,793 --> 00:19:48,344
She posted all
about it.
515
00:19:48,344 --> 00:19:49,724
Who's that? Huh?
516
00:19:49,724 --> 00:19:51,241
Aww. Eliot.
517
00:19:51,241 --> 00:19:52,793
[ Inhales sharply,
exhales ]
518
00:19:52,793 --> 00:19:55,931
God, everybody's
moving away, huh?
519
00:19:55,931 --> 00:19:58,517
But not the most
important one.
520
00:19:58,517 --> 00:20:00,517
[ Smooches ]
The most important person...
521
00:20:00,517 --> 00:20:02,172
[Smooches]
...of my life.
522
00:20:02,172 --> 00:20:04,137
[ Smooches ]
I'd give everybody else up.
523
00:20:04,137 --> 00:20:05,448
[ Smooches,
smacks lips ]
524
00:20:05,448 --> 00:20:07,103
[ Horn honks in distance ]Yeah.
525
00:20:07,103 --> 00:20:09,034
Show me -- Why don't you
show me pictures of your mom,
526
00:20:09,034 --> 00:20:10,413
'cause I didn't see it.Yeah, I didn't even
give it to ya.
527
00:20:10,413 --> 00:20:11,586
Here.
528
00:20:11,586 --> 00:20:13,586
Holy shit.
529
00:20:13,586 --> 00:20:14,620
Wow.
530
00:20:14,620 --> 00:20:16,172
I'm like, "Go, girl!
531
00:20:16,172 --> 00:20:18,586
Slay, girl.
Work it, girl.
532
00:20:18,586 --> 00:20:20,724
Covergirl!
Slay, Mama!"
533
00:20:20,724 --> 00:20:21,965
Covergirl!Covergirl!
534
00:20:21,965 --> 00:20:23,758
Be the curl.Both: Covergirl!
535
00:20:23,758 --> 00:20:24,689
Covergirl!
536
00:20:24,689 --> 00:20:25,827
Covergirl.Covergirl.
537
00:20:25,827 --> 00:20:26,793
Covergirl!
538
00:20:26,793 --> 00:20:27,655
Covergirl!Covergirl!
539
00:20:27,655 --> 00:20:28,724
Devachan.
540
00:20:28,724 --> 00:20:29,827
Covergirl!Covergirl!
541
00:20:29,827 --> 00:20:31,448
Covergirl!
Ow! Dude!
542
00:20:31,448 --> 00:20:33,068
Ooh. Sorry.
I'm sorry. Sorry. Ow!
543
00:20:33,068 --> 00:20:33,965
[ Groans ]
544
00:20:41,689 --> 00:20:43,137
♪ Cover girl ♪[ Camera shutter clicking ]
545
00:20:43,137 --> 00:20:44,379
♪ Work it, girl ♪♪ Give a twirl ♪
546
00:20:44,379 --> 00:20:47,310
♪ Do your thing on the runway ♪
547
00:20:47,310 --> 00:20:49,000
♪ Work ♪♪ Supermodel ♪
548
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:51,172
♪ You better work it, girl ♪♪ Of the world ♪
549
00:20:51,172 --> 00:20:54,551
♪ Wet your lips and make love
to the camera ♪
550
00:20:54,601 --> 00:20:59,151
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